Frostbite


Oh my gosh...
How do I even describe what this is like? What all of this feels like?

... I had been standing in a blizzard with my arms out at my sides, trying to cover others and protect them from the continual downpour of snow. The temperature was freezing and I could see my breath. I was shivering and cold and tired and weak. But I couldn't stop. I couldn't stop being the shield they needed. My tears froze on my face, so I didn't cry anymore because of the irritation from the frozen water on my cheeks. The snow piled up on my arms and weighed them down. I needed a break. But I couldn't. They'd be exposed to the harshness and I must cover them. But no one was there to cover me. The precipitation landed on me as if I were part of the earth. And soon I grew numb to it. I'm used to being cold. Frozen. But it's killing me and I'm dying. Suddenly, I'm pulled out of the snow and am brought to a place of rescue. And now, I'm being thawed. And ohmygosh, it hurts! I want to go back into the storm, into the cold. At least then I was numb to what was happening. I couldn't feel it anymore so it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. But now I'm being forced to feel everything which the snow and cold hardened and froze. Everything which had been numb is now being warmed and as the blood starts to flow again, so does the pain. It rushes to every limb and painfully enters parts of me which had turned different shades unnatural for my complexion. This is happening at once, overwhelming me. Must every affected area be treated? Can just one part be ignored? I'm fine, really. But I'm not fine, it's obvious by the rigidity in my movements. Though I'm out of it, the storm still haunts me and every fiber of my being wants the frostbite to go unchecked. To be left alone. It hurts. It hurts so much.

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