It's The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Christmas Time!!
So remember when I said there was only one holiday that trumps Thanksgiving? Christmas!!!! I absolutely love Christmas. The lights, the scents of sugar plum lotions and sprays, the adorable winter themed characters. Everything about it just puts me in such a great mood. My family and I usually start decorating in October; tree up and adorned with lights and bows on banisters and chairs. Just the thought of it puts a smile on my face. I don't really have a clear cut path for this post, I'm just excited for Christmas.

In a way, that is similar to my situation right now. I don't really have a clear cut path for my life but instead of the excitement I feel for Christmas, this terrifies me. It frustrates me and wears on my hope. I'm not going to give a sob story, just stating where I am right now. I'm also not looking for advice, I'm just venting. This is hard and treatment makes it all harder. I'm still taking it one day at a time and still strongly considering discharging. I'm at a crossroad but I'll go on about that more in a later post. In treatment, we are taught not to avoid our feelings and/or difficult emotions... But I think I'm going to avoid and distract myself with the wonders and glorious nature of my favorite holiday. Happy December 1st!!

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