Falling Off the Bike
A rough but necessary process
Did you know that if a baby bird's egg is broken open for it by outsiders during the hatching process, the bird will not survive? I didn't know that but it totally makes sense why. The reason is because it would not have learned how to use its own strength and will not be strong enough to survive on the outside. It may seem harsh to leave a struggling baby bird alone but to "help" it would really only be killing it. (Hmm, I think a post on boundaries will be coming soon)... Who of us, back when we were learning to ride a bike, had our parents ride it for us? None of us. Of course, they helped us and taught us but they couldn't do the work for us. When we fell and scraped our knees and elbows, they helped us get up and back on the bikes. They made sure we were all right but they allowed us to fall again if it meant learning a new and useful and even fun skill. I think that's the season where I may be now. Hatching out of the egg, learning to ride the bike. Learning that it's okay too fall off while learning to ride the bike. I don't remember what it was like as a child learning to ride but I'm sure I realized that my skin was tougher than the scrapes it acquired and that my body had the ability to heal itself when it got hurt. I'm sure I didn't look at my skinned knee and think that all was lost, that there was no hope in ever learning to ride a bike ever (can you imagine how melodramatic I would've been if that were true, lol). I got back on it and kept trying until, eventually, I succeeded! I learned how to control that metal beast and it is one of my favorite things to do today!
I have been anxious, very anxious lately concerning my apps for college and the apprenticeship. This whole time I had been focused on which one to choose if I get accepted to both. But for the past couple of days I have been entertaining a new thought: that I might not get accepted to either!! For the first time, I am actually aware of that as a possibility. And as self critical as I am, that would definitely have left me in a bad head space if it happened before I received this awareness. The truth is, I may not get accepted to either one. And that is okay because I know God would have something better. He has opened and closed so many doors for me and has made ways for me where none could be found otherwise. I am very secured in and filled with peace about the situation and the possibility that neither may be His plan. And that is OK because His plan has never failed me. It may sound like a trope in Christendom but I am learning more and more along this, my journey that the Holy Spirit is truly ordering my steps and I am truly trusting that He is doing so.