April 8, 2017

Freaking out about an unexpected decision

What are you going to do when you have to leave?
I'll find some way to deal with it.
No you won't, I mean sure but not like the way I help you.
... But--
And you'll feel that word you hate. You know the word. Yes, I knew the word.
I will never leave you feeling that way but without me, you'll feel it to your core. 
But I still feel it now so...
So can you imagine how much worse it'll be? Without me?
I just... but... you're no good for me. I said that last part quietly and with doubt.
We both know you don't believe that. Come on, don't let them get in your head. I'm already here, there's not enough room anyway. He snickered. I made a face.
It was a joke. I'm not hurting you.
He slyly questioned me, Have I ever really hurt you? You've never had a heart attack, have you?
No.
Your body still abides by its monthly rules, doesn't it?
Well, yeah. For the most part.
You've still got a full head of hair, except for what you shave. I think you're okay. Don't you?
I mean, yeah. I guess.

If you're struggling in life, please know there is always hope. There is always Hope.