A Piece of My Mind

Hmm

I'm not sure what's been going on with me lately, I've been feeling very bogged down and dry(?). I want to start off with a welcoming, "Happy February everyone!" but I feel that would be a bit fake, as I'm not feeling that cheery. I'm thinking over one of my recent posts about choosing recovery and wanting treatment. It's so funny how quickly the desire to live without an ed is pushed in the far parts of your mind, almost as if you never even had the newfound desire. My mind has been very obsessed lately with numbers: calories burned and calories consumed, weight loss and (seemingly continually) gained. It's tiring, exhausting. Admittedly, I've been feeling alone and very frustrated with myself. I've been doing a lot of comparing of myself and others and it's challenging to remember what God says about me.

Maybe it's not so challenging to remember, rather, it's challenging to believe. But that's all a part of this journey I'm on, right? Working on believing the truth verses comparing myself to how I 'should be'. Owning what God feels about me and what He says I am instead of owning what some illness tells me I'm not. Easier said than done, guys.

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